AKU DEPRESS

WHY ME.

Harap Maaf Permohonan Anda Tidak Berjaya

Goals

Goals. why is it so hard for me to think on where I see myself in 5 or 10 years.. 

I don't get it.

I don't wanna make a pointless blog now really, but seriously...

this new blog stuff is really weird... kinda used to the old one.. but whateva..

ok so the best that I can think of on where do I see myself in 5years is.. I'll be 26....(obviously)

ok I could be working, as an ACCOUNTANT, or I could be doing my ACCA in Bangor University... or I could be doing YOUTUBE? (vlogging, sketches) something like that... I dunno about finding my true love, but I do feel like, I'm going to get a GOOD job, and starting to build a name and become a somebody.

in 10 years (31years old) 

I might have gotten married to a guy I COMPLETELY HEAD OVER HEELS for.. and probably got a kid or two, (at least one in my tummy...). about Career.. I'd probably somewhere starting doing my own business...(so late) cafe, hotel something. I dunno. maybe.. 

so there you go, I don't have specific goals, but roughly that's what I'm seeding inside my brain. Hopefully, I'll achieve it in the best possibly way I can! Pray for me guys! 

who else?

me.

xoxo

(tired-but-way-to-excited face)

what I thot I'd be.. and what I've become.

(the pic above show how I hide my pain, my confusion behind that smile)

when I was 7,
I imagine, that rite now, I'd be studying oversea.

I thought that I will get 10As for SPM, really active in sports then I got to do diploma at UiTM,
n then for Degree, because I imagine I'd get 4flat, Mara will send me to oversea... somewhere like Cambridge or Oxford... or Harvard.

when I was little I thought I'd be freaking SMART. GENIUS. or whatever it is.

I thought that later, at Cambridge, I make new friends, then suddenly some hot English guy would wanna go out with me, and turns out that guy is my soul mate, then we'd get married... have babies.

after that I thought that I'm gonna have my own business, and become rich.

and I live happily ever after.

BUT I WAS WRONG.

I got only 1A for spm, I didn't get Uitm, I didn't get 4flat.
I went to IIC, not active there at all, never participate in any sports.. at all...
only got 3.15 cgpa
and again for Degree
couldn't get Uitm, or Uia
no Govt universities want me.
fell inlove twice.
got broken hearted twice.
worked at some choc shop, with little pay.

what's happening to me right now...
is NOTHING similar to what I expected when I was 7.

so what do I do now?

where do I go?

at the age of 16 I got a little change of plans.
when I was 7, I wanted to be a Doctor, at the age of 16, I changed my mind. because I had to study accounts, and I kinda like it. I wanted to be an accountant and I also wanted to become a singer..

my mind was jumbled up.

I didn't do anything properly.
I still want to study physics and Chemistry, refuse to change class to take economy subjects.
I was so confuse. I thot I'd become something else with the help of Physics and Chemistry, but I failed at both subjects. thank god, I'm good at accounts.

 then applied for Science stream at Matrix (I have no idea why I did that). got rejected.

govt force to go to National Service. So I did.
figured out that not all friends will stick to you till the very end. I Cried.
I was freaking sad.

after went to NS, and I didn't get to go to uitm, IIC offer letter came to my house...
my mom want me to go there.. taking diploma in accounting. I refused at first, because... I dunno, I wanted to take diploma in music at uitm.

but I agreed at last.

Now, I dunno, what to do.
cuz like I said up above, Uitm rejected me again. So is Uia, the parent of my college.
and guess what, my friend got to study degree at Bangor, Wales.
I am so freaking jealous right now............................

I am currently not doing anything at home, jobless.

in confusion.

I want to go to MMU, but my mom insist I tried govt universities.

hey mom, they REJECTED me.

TWICE.

so now, I dunno!
:'(

Randomness can kill one soul.

I'm still trying~ hello, anybody notice?

so a couple of days ago, I spent my time with my sis and my couz playing monopoly, it just so happened that it was my lucky day... I kept getting GOOD fortune, and my sis was the absolutely opposite of my lucky-ness... she got so pissed... I mean, her first "chance" was "go to jail".. then it just got worst. you really should watch the video.. I love the last part where she's gone bankrupt.

seriously, before this, I was the one who got bankrupt all the time when playing this game, and I was kinda paranoid. but a few yrs later, I start playing again, and well, I got lucky! isn't that just weird???

my cousin, can't stop making fun of my sis, the other day, the first thing she said to her was "HI BANKRUPT!"

my sister gone insane.

Gerard Way & Lynd-z best photo.

that's like the sweetest thing I have ever seen in my entire life.
it proves that true love exist.

I have no say on True love as I've never experience it...
but I love watching other people who's so inlove with each other, they became so cheesy.. and all..
it's fun to watch their funny behaviour.
but it's painful to watch too...
cuz u wish those people were u and ur soulmate,
when u realize it's never gonna happen.




















fans even draw cartoons of them;











I love this pic;


and the most epic ones,




let's see the equation shall we,


Gerard Way

+

Lindsey Way





=

BANDIT LEE WAY.




Aren't you glad you didn't kill youself Gerard? Aren't you?




"I sure do"

(I think that's what he'll say)

Need your support.

I'm starting to vlogs guys, need all the support in the world....

check out my videos,






I would really appreciate it if you guys can subscribe me, like all my videos, share it.. and whatever that can make me feel good...

I really want to be the greatest vlogger of all time guys! support me! hehe

If you got some comments on how I need to improve my vids, leave a comment below...
=)

SUBSCRIBE me on Youtube- http://www.youtube.com/user/DIVAinDenial
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your help is much needed.
Love you guys xoxo

I so want Russian Blue kitten

look at them, so cute and adorable and cute.. ohh... I want one!!!!

or any other grey cats;

I WANT A CAT.

A GREY CAT ATLEAST..

IF I CAN'T GET THE RUSSIAN BLUE...

=D

Nurse nak kerja biasa2~

Ok so beberape hari lepas, 13 September, kitorang pergi Mid Valley ntok carik kerja, well ok, bukan aq yg crk kerja, tp membe aq yg da ade diploma in Nursing crk kerja... tp bukn nk crk kat hospital, nk crk kat Mid Valley........

reason? xtau la... try test error? tak tau, dan ni ade beberape video clip yg aq amek time tu...

(sori aq sedikit poyo)



lepas carik kerja, kitorang berjalan2 dan terase seperti nk habiskn masa lagi kat Mid Valley, antara bowling or wayang.. oleh itu, kitorang decide tgk wayang.....



then ofcourse, wayang pkul 6.30, time tu baru pkul 4.30 cmtu, so kitorang decide, main jgk ar bowling....



dan akhirnye, kitorang tgk movie tu,


sampai rumah pkul 9lebeh..xdela lambat kn???

erm..

hehe.

Hari Raya

2011

1st Raya

RUMAH

Rumah Makyong; 

Seremban with my abah n my niece, Zara Evana

Raya 2

Jusco.

(baru shopping)

Raya ke 3

Ipoh

Raya ke 4

Kulim

(Rumah paksu)

location : sg (xtau sg ape)

 baju raya khas ntok sg...

Raya day 5 and beyond

and look at my collections;

not bad for a 21 year old!
hell yeah~